AND YET I SING

It was six years ago I was driving to the hospital facing the news. We had been told my mother’s heart was too weak and there was nothing more they could do. It was time to take her home. As the song began on the radio I almost turned it off. The last thing I wanted to hear that morning was some peppy “ooh, ooh, ooh” song – yep, that’s how it started.

Something told me to LISTEN. Ah – grace right in my face again. These are the words I heard:

I’m casting my cares aside. I’m leaving my past behind. I’m setting my heart and mind on you Jesus.  … Today is the day that you have made. I will rejoice and be glad in it. And I won’t worry about tomorrow I’m trusting in what you say. Today is the day.

There much more to the song and I hope you will listen to it today. Even if you know it, take the time to listen and hear what it says to you. (Today Is the Day, written by Paul Baloche)

Throughout the journey of taking her home from the hospital, cherishing every moment with her for the few days we had left with her, it was that song I worshiped to every day as I thanked God for the wonderful privilege of getting to be her daughter. After her death and when I returned to work as Associate Pastor at Hendersonville First United Methodist Church --- that song resonated in my heart and my living. Sometimes it was painful to hear but always it drew me to that deep place of grace.

Why do I think on this today? Because it’s a shitty day. The night was the same. I cried. I prayed. I fussed. I fumed. We’re allowed to do that, you know. God can handle it.

I have many people I love who are very special to me. But I can count on two hands those who are MY PEOPLE. You know, the ones who know me – the good, the bad, the ugly – and still love me. The ones who love me enough to say things I don’t always want to hear. The ones whose opinion really matter. The ones who stick with me no matter what.

Sharon and Keith Waters are two of them … We have been friends many, many years. We have laughed through many things. Sharon and I traveled and studied together through seminary. We attended preaching conferences. We love getting on a good rip about the state of the church and the world. Keith and I have a mutual love of lights, flowers and the Chicken Dance (much to Sharon’s chagrin). We have seen each other through the death of pets, of parents, through hard life change and daily living in general. We’ve vacationed together. We even went through “The Great Kidney Caper” – as I named it – when that midnight call came in that there was a kidney available for Keith!

It is astounding to me the health issues he has known throughout his life yet through it all he has maintained a positive spirit. He is an incredible fighter. When he was diagnosed with Multiple Myeloma a few years ago I think I spent an entire day shaking my head and wondering what more that poor body of his could take. He amazingly survived stem-cell transplant and went in to remission. And we rejoiced. And through it all I found myself singing Today is the day …

We knew due to the nature of his cancer that it was not a matter of IF it returned but WHEN. Well it hit the fan yesterday. It’s back.

Don’t get me wrong – I’m not preparing for his funeral! We have much more mischief to get in to, more beach vacations to go on, more lights to admire, I’m determined to kick his butt at Words with Friends one of these days.

But I dread what lies ahead. More treatment – more horrible sickness. Much prayer.

And yet I sing.

I sing because we all share what is the most important thing that cements our friendship: faith. Actually I don’t even consider them friends anymore. At some point in one of many phone conversations Sharon and I agreed we are so close we really look upon each other as sisters. We’ve even talked of all living together some day – I would have my own “sister’s apartment” in the house.

So my brother in Christ and my brother I adore has a hellacious road to travel. AGAIN. And faithfully and lovingly by his side Sharon will be. Don’t even try to pry her away. She’ll do a “Julia Sugarbaker” moment on you. More about that some other time!

If you are a believer in prayer I ask that you surround them in it.

If you are not, I ask you to think good thoughts their way.

In the midst of it all I ask this: keep singing. No matter what life hands you today, keep singing.

Have you forgotten who you are and how precious you are? SING

Do you wonder if that argument you had will ever be patched up? SING

Are you waiting for test results to come in? SING

Do you wonder how you will pay next month’s bills? SING

Do you think you will never get better and feel healthy again? SING

Are you sad over friends no longer in your life? SING

You get it. I could go on and on but you can fill in the blanks with your own situations.

It sounds fluffy and light-hearted to say “sing”. If you’re still reading you might be thinking how you’d like to smack me about now. But I don’t suggest we continue singing as a way to flee from our troubles but as a way to dive right in to them and let those troubles know we are not afraid, we will not give up, we are not alone.

If you can’t sing your way out of a wet paper bag, I urge you: sing even louder!

Tell your troubles to get the hell out of Dodge, go fly a kite, take the elevator down and keep on going.

And perhaps in our singing each of us will feel a flutter in our heart that stirs us to a deeper place. A place I like to call GRACE (more about that another day). I know it reminds me that God is alive and well and very present in every part of my life. It doesn’t mean life will be all rainbows and daisies. But it does mean I am not alone. You are not alone.

Today is the day

I choose to sing

Enjoying the Journey,

Debra

Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding.

In all your ways acknowledge Him and He will make your path straight.

Proverbs 3:5-6